Dear Gracelyn
I am stuck in between a feud that involved two used-to-be friends. I was never involved with their friendship, but now that they are enemies, I keep hearing unnecessary comments about the other person.
It has gotten so bad that they completely avoid each other and create tension for everyone around them. What can be done to help these two people realize that they need to forgive each other and move on with their lives?
Sincerely,
Annoyed Friend
Dear Annoyed Friend,
This sounds like a messy situation indeed! I am sorry that you have to go through this ordeal, but I do believe that I can help you resolve this conflict.
Because your friends do not realize that they are annoying you with their constant feuding, you can now go “undercover” to take matters into your own hands! Begin by sending cryptic messages through the mail system to one friend and label it as being from your other friend. Continue this until your friends recognize each other as virtuous and make up with one another. Your goal should be to mend the friendship by making your friends think they are apologizing to each other when, in all reality, you are the mastermind behind their mending friendship. Could this blow up in your face? Yes. But even if it does fail, it will be amusing for you in the meantime.
If this course of action does not work, it may be time to think drastically. You need to get married. That’s right, you read it correctly. If you have a wedding, you must invite all of your friends; therefore, both of these friends will be forced to see one another. In fact, you can even assign them to seats at the same table at your reception. This plan may seem like a disaster in the making, but if you really think about it, all romantic comedies are founded upon disaster-ridden plans that result in forever friendships. Make your life – and the lives of your friends – a romantic comedy. Finding a spouse prior to the end of the semester shouldn’t be a problem. Three weeks is more than enough time for the average Grace student.
If you follow my advice, your friends will stop annoying you in no time!
-Gracelyn
