Campus Life

Alpha’s Most Alarming Moments.

by Liz Palmer


By now, most students — even the freshman — know about Alpha’s crazy fire alarms. Although they go off frequently, it is never the same story. Ashley House gives us the inside scoop to some of Alpha’s comical fire alarm stories.

“Anything sets off the alarm. Too long of a piping hot shower, hair spraying underneath the detector, cooking Ramen without water, popcorn (obviously), overcooking an already cooked cookie (fabulous), and breadsticks. Ladies, your microwave is not an oven.”

Sometimes it is not what caused the detector to go off that makes the surprise alarms hilarious, it is what people do when they are abruptly interrupted. “Some girls come outside in just Afghans, some come out in slippers. There have defiantly been a few girls that get interrupted during a shower and come out in robes or even a towel. Some come out in just socks or no shoes at all. One girl even took the time to put in earrings of all things — it’s amazing what people do when they are disoriented. Also, there have been some cases where girls wear ear plugs or are just heavy enough sleepers that they don’t wake up. Whatever happened to no child left behind? Don’t ever leave your roommate. Who does that? Lastly, my favorite is when girls come out wrapped in their entire bed. Why did you need your entire bed to come outside?”

Of course, being that we are your typical teenage girls, we have to let the entire world know when the fire alarm goes off as well. “Girls go crazy and start posting on Facebook and Twitter; or even better, they start Instagramming photos of firemen.”

Lastly, House’s final words of advice regarding fire drills are: “Ladies, especially in the winter, you should ALWAYS leave a hoodie and shoes out in case something goes wrong and please, please make sure you are wearing pants!” This is just something to keep in mind for the next incident, which—knowing Alpha—could very well be next week.